4 Reasons Why We’re Safe this July 4th
July 3rd 2007 by Dr.MOZ in July 4th, Healthy Events
The 2006 issue of the Consumer Product Safety Commission’s Fireworks Annual Report (pdf file) suggests proves that there is nothing more dangerous on July 4th than an American male with a handful of firecrackers. I think most of us are more surprised to hear that the Fireworks Annual Report actually exists than we are to know that men regularly blow themselves up on the fourth, but here are four government-backed safety systems currently in place that you may not be aware of:
1. The War on Watermelons by the US Consumer Product Safety Commission (jump to .mov)
Executive Summary: (a) stay away from watermelons with M-1000s packed inside, and (b) blowing-up illegal fireworks by destroying creepy mannequins is a “win win”.
2. The George H. Bush Fireworks Movie (jump to .mov)
Executive Summary: (a) he has faced many challenges, and (b) “don’t let youngsters light fuses”, and (c) keep a “bucket’a water nearby”.
3. Kidd Safety (jump to Kidd Safety Fireworks site)
Executive Summary: (a) kids should NEVER play with fireworks, and (b) blowing-up watermelons looks like more fun than hang’in with Kidd Safety, and (c) time for new safety mascot.
4. The National Council of Fireworks Safety Test (jump to safety test pdf)
Executive Summary: (a) most Americans take fireworks safety tests right before they begin drinking on the 4th, so we should all be fine, and (b) consider carrying a fire extinguisher until the 5th.
So there you have it folks, we are all really pretty safe when you consider the government programs running behind the scenes. In the off chance you were hoping for actual safety tips for the 4th, come back tomorrow for a full collection of slightly more useful ideas.
Happy 4th of July!
Dr.MOZ
